a new mask selected from the galleries,
its fresh, smooth texture feels glorious
what does it matter that it cold and clammy,
it stirs me, the feelings in me stir,
a mask unknown to me yet i selected it,
walked by hundreds in the gallery, and yet i stop at this one,
its all blood red, black spots sit on the eyes and the mouth,
the mouth, an abyss in which everything is swallowed,
horns sprout from the chin and the devils peaks
they turn in unnatural patterns,
the cheekbones are pushed far to high and the mouth,
the mouth is pulled down and contorted,
baring its hideous fangs.

Am i trying to inspire fear or reality,
do i lie to tell the truth, do i hold more value in simple actions than other people,
i think to much, so i choose a simplistic mask,
a mask that is black and white
a mask that dosent hide behind veils
a mask that means one thing
the end, what I've aspired to, DONE

does the mean justify the cause?
does the end justify the means?

321654987789654

another day another dollar
another day held by the collar
chained to my shell, iron cast by oneself.
but loves this forgiving sun bliss

my my

this is a surreal, medieval kind of world
in which a box, with eyes it held
was seen across the world and withheld
the precept ions of our mind, clogging and held
together the very stitches to which civilisation
through a protagonist, and subliminal recruitment
an army held together by wireless cables
cant move a step without the others knowing
the new media has clouded our mind, dumbed the senses, regurgitated wits.

nothings original, no stories to tell, what you see is what you get
and what you get usually gets repeated.

this new media i cannot let go of
because it hungers, and greedily prowls on the one thing i adore
the one thing that still allures me
the bait to the trap, my unicorn
the unattainable

my November

i wonder if i'll ever be loved

i wonder if people go to the city at night, to see the bright lights, the buildings that block out the sky or to see other people. i wonder if they do all that to be assured that they are not miniscule and the world belongs to them.

i wonder if people would find it unusual if i said i love the isolation, i like being reminded that people are like ants in the sense that they are everywhere and through travel i could be conquer a pursuit of first hand knowledge.

From Zulus to Samurai
From Monks to Inuit

a scorpion without its tail is still a scorpion, it just dosent know it.

the swan sang, in a refined lullaby, its notes depicting a soft stone reality

lost

i feel a strange emotion, i feel like i lost something I've loved and still loved, it just feels like the window has shut, i fucken fucked up, fuck my indecisiveness and my lack of courage. now forced to look through the fucking window when i had my foot in the door, good bye November, you have left a impression that will never be overcome.

every sunday i think of you, your features and of our conversations to come

wonderful

when i go home, i lay down
and make up a new life

i wanna see some palm trees

we can live beside the ocean
leave the fire behind
swim out past the breakers
watch the world die

welcome back.
you may look but you cannot read
for i have words meant to be spoken
to keep their meaning left unbroken
their meant for the one
the one that will remain loved
treasured until four horse men come for us
until the ones perfume fades to a whisper
a whisper to my ear.
though subtle ever powerful

the bat and the dove

once there was a bat, he lived high in the trees and never came down. once there was a dove, it was beautiful, mother natures finest work, and flew where ever it wanted to and wasn't afraid of an adventure.

one day the bat saw the dove and was overcome with feelings of passion and desire, but he wouldn't venture down, he was afraid, but one day the dove noticed him and came up to him, this surprised the bat as he wasn't expecting anything of the kind from the dove.

they talked for hours on end about their tales, but eventually the bat ran out of tales to tell(mind you he hardly said anything), and he was left to the wonder of the tales that the dove told. the tales themselves were grand, inspiring all kinds of emotions, fear, suspense and intrigue.

without knowing it, the bat grew to liking the dove and thoroughly enjoyed her company. in fact he enjoyed her company so much that he would make time to go and see her, and hear her, and look at her. but he could never ask anything of her.

that put the bat in a bit of a pickle, because after all the tales, after all the times he seen her, he felt like he could never be with her, and he was under the belief that the dove was with some one else. this put the bat into a conflict of the mind, he wanted to be with her but lacked the courage.

and throughout this, he still visited the dove, and they shared their stories, they laughed together, ate together and generally had fun together, but they would never be together.

i don't put titles anymore

you, u, you, u, you
need hmmmmmmmmmnnn
aaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh

this is weird

u

pro-Your smile
con-nothing
pro-your hair
con-nothing
pro-your body
con-nothing
pro-the way you dress
con-nothing
pro-your humour
con--nothing
pro-your laugh
con-nothing
pro-your lips
con- nothing
pro-your truly magnificent, captivating mind

what would i do with out you

went to the city today, been awhile since my last venture, actually haven't been there since i lived in the city, and i was shocked, not at the old buildings, it was the new ones (David Jones in particular), people, people, people, a sudden rise in vanity, it was disturbing, seeing manicured men stride with superficial women wheeling top of the line prams, spoilt brats dawdle besides them with grandparents only living through the expenses paid by so called elitist, all the while families try to out do each other with how much they spend.

it felt like the world has turned into some fake play land.
it made physically sick
fucking commersalism

what the world comes to

you're going to have to click on the picture to read it

what the fuck is this world, running to? you didn't leave a message, at least i coulda' learned your voice one last time, daily minefield this could be my time, how 'bout you?

back in the day

i wish i lived back in the 1800's, when life was so simple and i could travel to far untouched lands, discover natural splendor, secluded my self with the ones i love, provide for them by simple means. swim with them in isolated watering holes guarded by roaring waterfalls. tell stories of requited love, bravery and honour, loss, and of pursuit of greed. imagine the stories the stars will tell and i will translate them for lovers, sate peoples simple desires in the wilderness.

long periods of time segregated lead to me thinking. me thinking is bad, bad bad bad bad bad. when i think for some stupid reason i think of questions that don't have answers, when i don't have answers i get depressed.
now throw in the fact, when also isolated, i over analyse usually meaningless sentences said by people. imagine thinking about one sentence not for hours but for three or four days, and being isolated you don't get answers to the question you are looking for(mind you there is no question) and this leads to further depression.
no mix this all up and you get i nice big bowl of ' i depress myself, i segregate myself, pretty much i fuck my life up as much as i humanly can' soup.

wow that relieves the senses a bit.

ALONE AGAIN

JUST WHAT THE FUCK HAVE I DONE TO DESERVE THIS SHIT!!
i don't understand why I'm being ignored, it all seemed so good no things are turning sour. WHY? was it just that one line?

dark seclusion entice me, pull me away from what I know, persuade me with perversion, seduce me with glimpses of wonderful atrocities. allowing for the audacious behaviour, fuelling an orgy of pleasure.

don't trust the human race, but have complete faith in them to survive, no matter what moral codes need to be broken

whats my problem, i feel like I'm trying to start fights with people i know, i feel angry and depressed at the same time.

i felt good two seconds ago, now i feel like i want to kill myself again, what is this shit, god must be mocking me, fucking joker, clown, why do high powers enjoy such irresponsibility, why can they play tricks all day

just what the fuck am i saying

confession

I've never wanted you so much, it burns, for the first time i cried last night in my bed 'cause i wasn't next to you, i want to wrap my arms you and hug you 'till we become one being, i miss talking to you, your the sun to my dark mind, and you, for the first time didn't speak to me, it was like you ignored me. I'm trying to figure out why but cannot point out a cause.
i still remember the first time you touched me, it shocked me and amazed me at the same time, the first person ever to do that. i left with a buzz that night, you probably think I'm petty, that it was nothing, but you don't understand my life, I've done so well to cloud myself, make me known to no one, no one knows anything, to any big extent, because I've allowed and encouraged it that way. yesterday i failed for the first time, I'm not copying well with it. can you tell?
this is my first ever confession

pe-pole

nuts, driven in circles, nuts, lost my head, driven mad by desires, holding myself in check, struggling, i feel rejected without ever been spoken to. Friends turn enemies in my head, what do i say?
what to say?
someone speak to me?
i feel unwanted, like a baby left outside a door for unknown strangers

i have been gagged. and the person who did the deed was me. i think it better for me not to talk. I've done this before and it hasn't worked but hey whats different now. nothing! because I've left it that way. i suck

on a lighter note I'm devastated

..

hole

unknowns, i love the unknowns yet i fear them, i would be nothing without them. they make me.
they make me
I'm made by unknown means. I'm meaningless.
lost in a hole. venturing in this wonderland. where nothing means anything. where everything is in a state of paradox.

i love it

one moment please!

with that I'm shot down, twirling uncontrollably, a puppet to the weak air, following my masters demands downward. forced down my throat i struggle to breathe.

i just bought vodka for no reason

why do i need o put a fucking title?

unnecessary evils, following Banksy, spending money easily, love hurts, inconceivable, mystery, perfume, smell, taste, skin, grapes, lust, Oscar Wilde, basic desires, isolated, smothered, honey, Elmo & Ollie,domination, sweat, blood, innocence, sinful, yields, unflinching, physical strength, yearn, temptation, ladies, morals, matter, infallible, i, me, mine, roses, sun.

the victorious moon rises above the sun
thinking she has won, the sun dies
all he ever wanted was to be with his love
all the while the moon is high,
together they're beautiful
like new lovers pain
they don't last for 5minutes full
and go back from whence they came.

?????????????????

i wanna be a vandal, i wanna feel a rush never felt before, i wanna spice things up. but most of all i wanna do it to send a message.to give something power

the Jester is about to rule the court

voice

the voice is an amazing thing. it can command people to an amazing feats. inspire fear into the hearts of a nation. to unite the people of a nation. sing ballards that conjure up all different emotions. to sate lovers.

amazing isn't it.

values

rally round your friends(thats imperative)
love loved ones
listen to family(they might not be right, but every now & then they make sense)
never silence ones opinion (the voice is very special to us)

morals

Is it wrong to think immoral thoughts?
is it wrong to act what you think?
what is man? an animal, a beast that thinks it is above other animals.
what if i told you about the pleasures in yielding to every temptation. freeing the brain from the confines of the locks we put on our selves with these 'morals'.
don't worry about god's view, he strung up his own son, so we're all fucked, but shhhhh keep that a secret.
people see a need to inflict pain on ones self and others, and people have been doing that for centuries now.
pick and choose sit and lose.
is there any value in """, do people hold it to high or not high enough. do people think that something that good needs to have a lasting bond.

fill in the blank

my dream

i don't want to talk about my dream on facebook so i'll do it here. bear with me here 'cause i didn't view it as a significant dream until the end.

from what i remember it's starts in one of those typical NY apartment style buildings. i'm not on the top level but i'm very close, i was standing next to an old hagged lady, who was giving me the 'ole side ways glance thing. i walk to the end of the hall open the door at the end (no. 11).

the room is painted a brick red (it might just be bricks but i can't remember), there was no order to the way the furniture was set out, shit everywhere. one window, that faces the sea, is the only source of light.

i throw my jacket on the couch that faces the kitchen, and take a seat on the dinning table and turn the telly on. a black and white picture pops up, in the picture there is 1950's tv reporter who is swearing like no one i've ever heard. then, static, then, another, more in control tv reporter, what he says is very important in the story yet i don't know what it was so feel free to make up anything at this part of the story, it be pretty much anything except for biological attack.

after the report i turn the TV off and it is deadly quite, until the whaling of some emergency siren picks up, and then panic, panic everywhere, chaos, anarchy. without thinking i let the chaos consume me, i sprint out the door grabbing no personal objects, not even locking the door, in fact leaving the door wide open.

down the hall and down the stairs and out the front door. and there, oh and there i spotted her (she will not be named 'cause of some personal fear and adoration i have for this person). but her presence instantly calms me, soothes my nerves and makes me feel like everything is going to be alright. i catch up to her, we talk, she seems in no rush, in fact shes heading to the movies. i follow assured in my safety when I'm around her, the conversation heats up and we chase each other around, grabbing and groping at each other when ever we get close enough. she leads me off and then, and then.............................

i wake up (or did i) and that's where the story ends (or does it)

art

my favourite artist is banksy, you should look him up, quite impressive, makes good political art.

love

am i in love or infatuated? i don't know, does this person capture my eye or my spirit? i don't know. the only thing that does seem clear at the moment is that my brain seems occupied.

long gone

long gone are days of old
long gone are days of sorrow
usher in the new days
days of clear heading
straight path
no fog or mist to shroud my heading
i feel anew

facebook is fucking confusing

all about me

alice in wonderland

i just found out that a new Alice in Wonderland movie is coming out, and this cheers me up, even more so now that i know Johnny Depp is in it and that Tim Burton is directing. comes out next year in march.

maturity

there are two ways to look at maturity I'm told.

1. loss of innocence
2. to come to the conclusion that you cannot change the system, you have to play it

youth is the only thing valuable in life, when we lose it all else is lost, meaningless.

henceforth youth is not measured by years but by state of mind.

INADEQUATE

I feel powerless in my life. i feel like my very existing is futile. there are things that i want to do yet i cannot, for i amount insurmountable hurdles of which my brains magnifies. I'm where i don't want to be, i yearn for people, i feel isolated, bounded by my minds propaganda, locked in by imaginary doors, i need power for what i must do, for the loneliness, the fucking loneliness is crushing me, drawing out my breath, slowly,slowly,slowly bringing me to the end, all the while i am very aware of this, this fucking predicament.
I'm a fucking fool for opening like this, yet it's attractive, a blueprint of my brain, my fucked up brain, which teachers loved yet i hated, my brain that see fit to ask questions that needn't, and shouldn't be asked, a brain that see fit to pass whole days by in the hope of coming to a conclusion on some perverted or petty idea.

what can i do?
i am amazed that people talk to me

i like the word perfume. i dont know why i just like it, is that wrong

got tickets to their show,

cant wait, wish i was around to see them when

they were young.

greatest setlist

live wishlist

1. evenflow
2. animal
3. once
4. spin the black circle
5. daughter
6. rearviewmirrior
7. black
8. porch
9. better man
10. jeremy

two song encore

1. rockin in the free world(cover)
2. alive

that concert would fucken rock

bad

when things look bad, we need someone to remind us that life is bright, i've found my everday sunshine, my eternal smile.
Fiat Lux

donnie darko

was told to watch this movie. really glad i did. one of the best sci-fi movies i have seen in a while, probably on the same level as lawnmower man, really interesting in the fact that it shows a lot of ideas. don't want to ramble on for to long so I'll finish with a line from a song in the movie.
'And i think it kinda funny, and i think it kinda sad
The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had'

highest virtue

disobedience is the highest virtue. for disobedience leads to revolution, and revolution is a noble cause. rebel people

Cogito Ergo Sum

realisation

to live is to die. knowledge of that fact leads to happiness.happiness brought on by taking every good, little detail in life and realising that the moment matters. time passes no matter what, we as humans worry to much about what will happen next and we miss whats happening now. we all become worm food there is now way out of it.
carpe diem

i hate authority, earn my respect. people that have power treat other people like cogs. power corrupts. i hate authority

every week

some people i just need, every week i look forward to a certain person, and after every discussion i am on a high, its the best feeling in the world, i love it.

bored

boredom is a plague on young minds. enslaves them into trains of thought that needn't be thought. i suffer from it badly. i am bored right now, as i write this my mind wonders, drowned in thought. swimming deep, finding more hidden caves that, lay hidden, deep are glorious treasures or macabre sorrows. thinking leads to depression, it quite simple in fact, smart people without money think, smart people with money buy, money doesn't buy happiness but it can rent it, everybody rents it once in awhile.

i feel stuck, unable to move, quicksand sand sucks me in greedily, first i struggle `but then whats the point, shit happens i've failed everything else, theirs nothing left.

people are the saviours of people, there is not going to be one man or women that will stand up and save us, there will be a symbol, given power by people, this symbol can come in any way shape or form, we all will have multiple symbols throughout life that will inspire us to hope, love, or to act, the ultimate would be marriage. the pinnacle of a confession of absolute adoration, yet to most people it has seem to lost its value. and that my friends depresses me, that people don't share the same sacredness of marriage i believe in, a certain action also has lost it value, it now held in the same regard as any general pastime.

god, some shit can just flow from the mind.

two of one

i believe that i have two personalities . one(he shall be know as Sepranza) has a high regard morals, believes virtues have true power, a force if you will that will guide him through life without the endangerment. people confide in him believing that their pleas fall on caring, kind ears. But, sometimes their cries fall on the other personality(he shall be known as Diablo) who cares not from other people, and believes that pursuit of immoral, sadistic goals truly make one feel alive. he ponders the act of killing a man, to have complete control over an adversary, feel life slipping out of him in your very grasp. to him there is no right or wrong, there is only what feels good and what doesn't. The paramount of a hedonist, pleasure is the only goal.

oh-ho i've rambled on for too long

Oscar Wilde

Oscar Wilde once said
"One's real life is often the life that one dose not lead"
also
"We teach people to remember, we never teach them to grow"

think about this

Are we born to fail, or have failed to be born.

SONG OF THE DAY

without delay
the song of the day
.................................
(SIC)
by
SLIPKNOT
ten years, ten mother fucken glorious years we have been graced with slipknot. they were saviours of metal, and this, as well as WAIT AND BLEED and SURFACING, made the album one of the greatest metal albums of all time.
"fuck this shit, I'm sick of it, your going down, this is a war!"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g86xUpMpQHk&feature=related

a first

the first time i will talk about my day since joining blogger. Today, i bought vodka(puts hair on ya chest), Alice in chains album(nothing safe) and DVD(unplugged), bought a pearl jam shirt which came with an limited edition vinyl(no.366/1000) that features two awesome songs:
-Even flow
-Porch(pats recommends everyone listen to this song)
Also bought two DVDs (black hawk down and the crow)
after the high of buying shit i realise i don't have money for board

rambles from the king

i just read an anti-religion blog. it makes me sad to read so much hate towards religion. people need religion, people need faith, they need a cause and religion offers them that cause. i don't get how something that promotes Love for one another can be seen as a bad thing. in the blog it said that if they walked by a catholic they would make it known that they aren't catholic, to me that's a rebellion for the sake of attention.

i believe religion has its flaws(especially in the past) , but i wouldn't say it is a bad thing(defiantly not an anti-social thing), with the rise of media and technology it was inevitable that religion would lose some of its value, but it is still treasured by people, in fact it has turned criminals into good citizens, is there anything wrong with that? fuck no.

you live on a world that has 6 billion people on it, your going to have different ideas, just because mommy and daddy took you to church dosen't mean that they are forcing you to a life of devotion to cross, it just means when you are young and off with the fairies they took you there for protection because that is what they believe in.

RELIGION is an idea, ideas are good, they unite people, give people cause. it is when an idea becomes an institution that when we get problems. institutions have rules, rituals. in turn it becomes a club, with special members. clubs think there better than other clubs, this is how you get wars.

PEOPLE!! stick to ideas and be open to others, let people speak.

PEOPLE

i've thought of something and that is people really live when death is present

SONG OF THE DAY

with delay
the song of the day
................................
FISTFULL OF STEEL
by
RAGE AGAINEST THE MACHINE
"Like radio is silent, Though it fills the air with noises"
nothing more needs to be said
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ueZMIoDwPrg&feature=related

communism

Communism? could it work? could the human show that love for one another that communism could work? Would you throw away all your money without second thought to join in communism? could you see the world leaderless yet the community the leader? would you share 'your' property with strangers in the belief communism can work? would you say yes?

wouldn't it be lovely if communism could work, its a shame it can't. to do you would have to change the human Psyche, to do so would rely on people like Donald Trump and Ray Kroc to give up all their hard earned millions and be same as people on the doll. would that be fair? I've come to the conclusion that no matter what Government or political system you have in place their will be cracks.
i will finish with a quote as a certain movie once said
"People should not be afraid of their Governments. Governments should be afraid of their People"
V

hurrah

should i join the army, hmmm, i would like that i think, to join the army. be all u can be, fight for freedom and all that shit,

'People are strange when your a stranger, faces seem ugly when your alone'
People are strange by The Doors

PEOPLE

It's amazing how much i acuatully miss talking to certain people, maybe i should get a shrink.

SONG OF THE DAY

with out delay
the song of the day
.................................
REVEREND WRINKLE
by
BLACK STONE CHERRY
From, i believe one, one of the best recent bands. Sounds so unique. love them.
honourable mention 'And We Die Young' by 'Alice In Chains'
Them playing 'Lonely Train' at Download music festival 2009
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m7iXuQZBu0o&feature=related
The only good video playing llive that i can find, couldn't find a good 'Reverend Wrinkle'

Lost

I feel lost in a swirling body of water, manhandled with no thought, churning, i've used the excuse going with the flow for to long, i need to swim to the egdes, i need relief, i'm drowning, i need hope, which can only be found in the sanctaury of the grounds that surrounds me, i can see them yet cannot touch them, sapped of my strength, i struggle, i need to do this i need relief

I NEED RELIEF

BLACK

" I know someday you'll have a beautiful life, i know someday you'll be a star in somebody's elses sky, but why, why, why can't it be, can't it be mine" lyrics from the song BLACK by PEARL JAM.

SONG OF THE DAY

without delay
the song of the day
..................................
BLACK
by
PEARL JAM
this is truly amazing song, definatly one of the best songs off the ground breaking ablum TEN which included songs such as PORCH, ALIVE, EVENFLOW, ONCE, JEREMY, and OCEANS. i just love this song, so much emotion.
Alt-Rock
The link below is them playing BLACK at Pink pop
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AFVlJAi3Cso
The link below is them playing ALIVE at Pink Pop
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VbhsYC4gKy4&feature=related

Sick of

1. i'm sick of capitalism
2. i'm sick of the pursuit of youth by the old
3. i'm sick of the pursuit of age by the youth
4. i'm sick of songs without emotion
5. i'm sick of education system

Keeping with the last one, education system is screwed up beyond recoginition, it dosent promote free thought, open discussion and ones opinion. I went through school being told right from wrong, told pretty much to follow. i didn't question for the sake of rebellion, just doubt creep into my mind, questioning history, english and religion. For example, i asked my history teacher why we didnt discuss in detail the bombings on Nagasaki and Hiroshima, got into an arguement whether those bombings experimental or just a sad point of the war. i took the point of the former. all throughout history it seems the victor in wars have had their low acts abolished. Religion needs to be questioned and thats all there is to it.

SONG OF THE DAY

Without further delay
here is the song of the day
...........................................
GLYCERINE
by
BUSH
a very well composed song
alternative
Live at Woodstock '99
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tm9uqA-b-OU

rambles

Read Sun Tzu's Art of War interesting to say the least. Newest translation published by Penguin Classic's, it has commentary from some of China's finest Generals namely Cao Cao. Go Ask Alice is a dark book, read it and it probably change your train of thought on some subjects, short book too.

"People know the price to everthing and the value of nothing"
Lord Henry (Picture of Dorion Gray by Oscar Wilde)

song of the day

new thing
the song of today is
drum roll
PARTY AT GROUND ZERO
by
FISHBONE
fishbone, possibly the best live band ever, they were able to conjure up so much energy on stage,
and this little number was released in 1985 on their self titled EP.
Ska and Funk
Below is them playing 'Skakin' To The Beat' and 'Party At Ground Zero'
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QszEuCW4QKc

money is crap

governed by virtual means. money is by no way healthy, it corrupts, very poision of the earth, people have lost thought of the value of possesions instead their replaced with a monetary value. it irritates me, because, despite all of this i work for possibly one of the biggest corporations in the world, a corporation that has policies of working kids over. people, the majority, have lost sentimental value, replaced with a blinded ambition for one thing and one thing only.

money.
that is why money is crap

"falsified" reality

i wonder, if cant look through your eyes than how do i know your real, i've had dreams as vivid as life, is this all life a figment of our own creativity, imagine then what "real" life would be then, would we be by ourselves, would we be ourselves, would we see anyone from our dream world in the real world. think of the former, alone in what would seem a foriegn enviroment yet be our home, see our parents, scared of their strangeness, would you eat their food , would they speak our langauge. a enviroment totally alien yet....................... home.