the beuty of this blog is that no-one will read it, and it's there for every one to read. a little ironic.

have i grow??
not physically, but mentally.
its been 2yrs since i started this blog, and i feel like i have accomplished nothing. Also, I'm perplexed too at this girl called Jessica. she deleted me on Facebook (which by its self i don't have a problem) but it just gets me thinking as to why she would delete me. we parted on loose terms i guess, but why me, and the other boys which she doesn't talk to?? it shouldn't be any of my business, but i speculate that her boyfriend told her to do it. it don't mean anything, but when your stuck up too 4am every morning, one tends to over think this things.

In winter's sorrow,
Despairing shadows grow long,
In my eyes spring dawns.

demons always seem more merrier then the angels

there are more people that wear masks now. more appearing as i speak. the masks are plain and black, i don't know them

let me tell you a story, set in the desert, a story of how i flung myself into a pit, as a sacrifice. now in this pit there was a tiger, a man eating tiger that has been starved for days.
now due to the nature of these things the tiger quickly set upon me, though ate me slowly, first my feet, then my legs, and then my arms.
behind was a ladder, i could chose to leave any time, so why did i stay?

i didn't, i climbed up the ladder...

all the priests and ceremony was gone, i stood facing east, i knew that for certain but knew nothing of why i knew that for certain. i was on a beach of not sand but rocks, rocks like bones, big bones jutting from the earth. these rocks were being beaten up by monstrous waves. these waves were black with lots of shine. no life existed, nothing of man existed.

only one reminder, a thousand orange handled needles protruding from the bone dry rock.

we can all assume that we are dead and alive, that we are vassals to lesser propose, that all determination and drive have been sucked out of humankind.

i stand utterly alone, watching your shadow meld with the city's walls, i suffer too the great depression, not the sill financial one that we put upon ourselves, but a much deeper one that strikes the bones, you left and i left you to your demise. i could have stopped it, selfish ambition got in the way of that.

bye bye nina